Shelter
by firedancer34
Summary: One Shot that follows after my Dark Prodigy story. Barbara and Helena finally come to terms with everything. B/H


_**Then I see your face**_

_**And know I'm finally yours**_

_**I find everything **_

_**I thought I lost before**_

_**You call my name**_

_**I come to you in pieces**_

_**So you can make**_

_**Me whole **_

_**~ "Pieces" by RED ~**_

**~BARBARA~**

As I roll out onto the balcony, I find Helena sprawled boneless across the back of the gargoyle that adorns the upper cornices. She reminds me of a cat, lazily basking in the waning evening sunlight on a windowsill. A tender smile lifts my lips and for a few minutes I find myself entranced with the sight before me.

Helena has been coming out here regularly each evening for the past week to think, and knowing how fragile and critical this stage of her healing is, I haven't disturbed her need for some privacy. Ever since her fight with Dinah, Helena has changed a great deal. I almost don't even recognize her anymore. The anger has finally fled…and not just over everything that has happened this past year. It's almost like she has finally accepted the death of her mother - and everything else surrounding that tragedy - and is ready to move on. If that is truly the case, then this new and improved Helena is going to take some getting used to.

She's still evasive as ever. Last night's not so subtle questioning in the med lab resulted in Hel dodging and changing subjects, proving that she still wasn't ready to open up about everything. But then neither was I at this stage of the game, so I finally cut her some slack and allowed her to steer the conversation away from something that was obviously too emotionally charged for her to address.

With a quiet sigh, I finally tear my eyes away from her lithe and relaxed form and look out over the city that has taken so much from us. If I'm really honest with myself, a tiny little part of me that I keep locked deep in the darkest corner of my heart, resents what happened to me and to my family. Dinah shouldn't have to be locked away in the Watchtower trying to cope with powers that she wasn't ready to bare. Helena should still be able to have a mother to love her and not know what it's like to be filled with so much pain, rage and guilt that she finally tried to take her own life. And I shouldn't be stuck in this fucking wheelchair the rest of my life, half the woman I used to be. Some days I hate this city, even if I will never utter those words aloud.

Helena says I'm still the same person I used to be, and she presses me every time she knows I'm getting into a funk to prove that I'm more than capable than most people who can walk. She never let me down during my recovery, knowing just when I needed to be pushed or distracted. She'd always let me have my moments of weakness, understanding all too well the need to rage at my loss and grieve for the life I would never have again. But she never let them last long, and early on I began to realize just how amazing Helena Kyle was.

She hid her sensitivity behind a mask of cockiness, tough attitude, and bravado. Most people never saw past the Bad Ass Helena Kyle, to see just how intelligent and kind she really is. But I saw it, and have been drawn to it for years. Truth be told, I need her in my life. So much so, that it scares the hell out of me to think what it would be like to not have her in it. I never really thought about it until after that whole nightmare with Quinn.

I cringe, thinking of how badly I blew things by letting my anger get the best of me. I reacted in a way I never in a thousand year would have imagined, and took my pain out on the one person that meant the most to me. What was even worse, was I was so blinded by my pain and guilt, that I didn't even realize for those two weeks that it wasn't her I was angry with. And then I almost lost her for good, and hadn't had the chance to tell her how sorry I was and how much I love her.

How much I love her.

How much do you love her Babs? I snort softly to myself, forgetting I have an audience that can still hear me quite well. That question has been something I have successfully avoided thinking about for longer than I care to admit. But over these past many weeks, I have come to realize that I can't ignore my feelings about her any more. Especially after everything we've both opened up about during this last week.

In a way, I am glad Helena and Dinah had their fight- as brutal and as painful as it was for all of us. Helena was right earlier when she told Dinah that it got a lot of things out in the open and cleared the air. We've all had too many secrets lately and have been hiding things from each other and from ourselves. Which is why I tried my luck at questioning Helena last night about what triggered her brief burst of vision.

It didn't get me anywhere….or maybe it did and I'm just trying to pretend it didn't so I can say I was imagining things. I sigh quietly again, and Helena's soft chuckle finally reminds me that I'm not alone out here.

"Yanno you sound like me right now. I've been out here every evening doing the same thing." I look back at her, and she has a lazy grin on her lips, her eyes still closed.

"Heavy thinking this week?" I ask, trying to deflect some of the attention off me. I don't know if I'm ready to discuss what's got me sighing.

Her eyes finally open as she rolls head to gaze in my general direction. "Yeah," she admits. Then the smile turns playful. "For once, right?" she laughs, making fun of her own appearance of being nothing more than the muscle of this operation.

My eyes crinkle in amusement. "Oh you can't fool me," I chuckle back. "You scheme with the best of them. In fact I'm starting to wonder if I should be worried that you've spent this much time out here thinking. Heavens knows what you could be thinking of. The last time you spent this much time out here you were trying to figure out how to talk me into supplying you with a motorcycle for sweeps."

Helena stuck her tongue out at me. "Yeah, and I think I had a pretty damn good argument too. You were such a spoilsport. I'm kinda glad I got in with the Animals because at least I finally got a bike out of it. And I didn't do nearly as much damage with that as I did with the Hummer."

I note two things in that statement. The first is Helena's past tense usage to a task that she can no longer perform. It is a good sign that she is really coming to terms with the changes in her life and accepting them. But I let that slide and focus on the other. "Nearly? That thing was in the shop practically every other week Hel. At least the Hummer lasted a month or more between trips."

"I was thinking more along the lines of property damage."

"Oh god," I groan. "I don't even want to know," I chuckle shaking my head.

She just flashes a wicked grin in my direction and then rolls her face towards the west. "Is the sun setting? I can't feel it on my face anymore."

"It's just getting ready to," I answer looking back to the sky.

"Describe it to me," she asks softly and I feel my breath catch at the request.

This is the first time she's asked anyone to tell her what something looks like since her being blinded. It is a massive step forward, and I know all too well what that simple request is probably costing her right now. It is humbling to have her trust me so much right now and I suck in a deep breath to try and calm the sudden butterflies in my stomach.

Releasing it slowly I look around us and begin describing everything I see in as much detail as I can. "The sun is just about to dip down past the estates in the distance. There are large fluffy clouds out this evening and the ones over the water are already transforming from gold to pink. The sky is a deep violet in the east…the color of your eyes when your emotions are high. And the sun in the west is blazing gold, the same gold when you are feral.

"Above us, the sky is a swirl of pinks, golds and violet's that I haven't seen in a long time, and the clouds are floating lazily along since there isn't much wind coming off the shore tonight"

My eyes track the last bits of sunlight, caught up in my description now, and really seeing the sunset for the first time in a very long time. "The sun is almost below the hill, and the last rays are reflecting off the buildings downtown. Wayne Tower is brilliant right now, like a shining prism, standing tall and proud in a sea of glass. With little breeze, the water is calm tonight and reflecting the sky perfectly. It looks like the river and harbor are on fire."

I fall reverently silent for a moment, only aware that Helena has moved when a slender hand feels for my shoulder. I immediately reach for it and tug Helena into my lap, barely conscious of what I'm doing. All I know for sure, is that I want her as close as possible to me right now.

Helena folds herself into my embrace, burying her nose into the juncture of the my neck and shoulder, sending a shiver down my spine. I feel a faint vibration against my chest and look down to see her eyes closed and a peaceful look on her face. It takes me a moment to realize the vibration is a sub vocal purr. She's happy and content right now and that brings me more joy than I can describe. I rest my chin atop her dark hair and squeeze her a little tighter when I feel her strong arms wrap securely around my waist.

I watch the sun finish its decent and continue narrating it. "The sun just dipped out of sight with a final flare. The sky to the east is a dark purple and above us the multi-colors are deepening into violets and purples as well. The clouds are outlined in silver and pinks and the skyscrapers are all reflecting the colors like the water. It's one of the most beautiful sunsets I've seen in a long time Hel," I whisper into her ear.

She lets out a sigh, and I can tell it's only with slight regret. "It is," she agrees softly and I stiffen slightly as hope kicks in.

"Can you…?" I ask gently.

She smiles, a bit sadly, and shakes her head. "I may not be able to see it Red, but you sure as hell paint a vivid picture in my mind. And the fact that I'm here to share it with you…that just makes it all the more beautiful."

I think that is all my brain needs to hear, because as soon as she tilts her head up and I gaze down into her beautiful face, everything in my world fades away. If ever there were a single moment in my life that I would never want to forget, it would be this moment. Blind though they may be, the depth of love, trust and emotion in those violet eyes is enough to override any fears or reservations I might have been feeling, long enough for me to lean down and gently kiss Helena.

It is brief, tender, and a bit timid on my part. And then my brain catches up with what I am doing and I jerk back with a gasp, my body tensing. _Christ, what was I thinking_?!

But Helena's hands are moving up to the back of my neck and pulling me back down for more and everything that I had been suddenly afraid of, melts away once more as she claims my mouth in a deeper more passionate kiss. God, but she can kiss.

When we finally do break away several minutes later, both of us breathing heavily, I rest my forehead against hers and clear my throat a couple of times, not quite trusting my voice. When I finally open my eyes, I find thin pupils banded in gold meeting my gaze. I can't help the smug smile that tugs at the corners of my lips.

"Now?" I ask, wondering if that was really my voice.

"Hell yeah," she chuckles huskily.

My grin fades a bit though as I take stock of what just happened between us. She senses it, whether from what she can read from my body, or just because we know each other so damn well. But she reaches a hand up to cup the side of my face and works to lay my concerns completely to rest. "Barbara, this is what I've been working up the nerve to talk to you about all week," she confesses finally.

"I've been trying to hide from the truth for so long, because I didn't think you would ever see me as anything more than your friend and partner. But I love you more than anything else in this world. That's why I took what happened with Quinn so hard…because I had failed and hurt the one person that I let inside my heart again. I thought I had lost you forever, and I couldn't live with that….I'm nothing without you in my life Barbara."

I've forgotten to breathe during her beautiful declaration, and feel more than a little light-headed when I finally suck in a reflexive breath. Dear heavens above…she loves me. She really does love me. Something in my chest breaks free, and a sense of utter euphoria floods through me, leaving me almost giddy in it's wake. I can't help the ridiculous smile that I know is spreading across my face and I lean in for another kiss as my arms tighten around her.

This time when we move apart, she's grinning. "I'm going to go out on a limb and say that I should take that as a positive response?"

I chuckle and run my fingers through dark hair, enjoying the shiver that runs through her body with that simple action. "A very positive reaction Hel," I answer softly as my own hands cup her face and I stare into her feral gaze.

"You are the one person to ever make me feel whole again Helena. You never saw me as someone limited by my chair. You helped me put my life back together after the shooting and I became the woman I am today because of you. I love you so much, and it wasn't until I thought I had lost you for good that I began to realize just how much you mean to me. I was so scared," I admit in a shaky whisper, as I fight the tears that are threatening to spill.

Helena leans over though, and places a reassuring kiss over each eye, and I feel myself calm under her gentle touch. "I promise to never leave you like that again Barbara. I will do whatever it takes from here on out to come back home to you….to come back home to this," she swears solemnly before she leans in and kisses me deeply once more.

With that promise, everything fades away once more, and it's just her and I and a love that I know will withstand even the worst of storms yet to come. She is my shelter from the world…and I am hers.

~HELENA~

I lay in Barbara's large bed, wrapped snugly against her and watch as the colors of my vision finally start to fade away. It doesn't bother me as much as it used to, because I at least have this much and possibly even more to come. It's honestly more than I had hoped for or ever expected. Barbara has plans to help me though and I chuckle at the memory of that.

"Care to share with the rest of the class?" my lover asks drowsily.

I turn away from my perusal of the room to let my last bits of vision be of her. "Was just remembering your workout plan for my vision," I say with a grin that is probably bordering on a leer.

"Things starting to fade for you?" she asks quietly, becoming more alert.

"For now," I answer unconcerned. Without warning, Barbara uses her considerable upper body strength to push me on my back and leans over me. I can just barely make out the smirk on her face before she leans down. "Time for your next set of exercises then," she whispers in my ear before she nuzzles a sensitive spot just below it.

My breath catches for a second, and then my vision flares to life again as I start to respond to her. I pull her down for a kiss and want to cry as a myriad of emotions flood through me. God, I love her so much. I never thought we would reach this point in our lives, and to be here now, experiencing this kind of happiness with her…it is the most indescribable feeling in the world. All I know is that like her, I will fight with everything I have to keep this. Nothing will ever stand in our way again.

She raises her head for a moment and looks down at me, her smirk growing even wider when she realizes my vision has returned. "My aren't you looking cocky," I laugh.

"I'm Oracle," she shoots back.

"Well this is a workout plan I could definitely get into," I can't help but chuckle, before her mouth seeks out mine once more.

I don't know if I will ever fully recover my vision, but I realize that it doesn't matter any more. I have everything I need right here in my arms. No matter what life decides to throw at us, we will always have our love for each other. Barbara is my shelter from the world…and I am hers.


End file.
